La vita e bella

I was talking today about this movie and i say one thing that is not correct. I said that i saw the movie tree times. I did started to see it tree times, but just finished one, the first. I like this movie, i wanted to see it again, i can't. Just can't. This movie is just too powerful, it touches me in a way that i just can't stand, it's too painful. I guess i have the same problem with the italian neo-realism. I just can't stand all those emotions, they are physically unbearable to me. They make want to do something about what is shown, and i can't, they aren't true, but look like it, they could be it and they probably where. I am like that.

Once i had a terrible fight with my father, i don't know now about what. I told him at some point that i didn't regretted anything i ever done. I maintain that. I don't regret anything i ever done. Those experiences made me what i am today, and i think i turned out to be not a bad human. That should be enough.

I do regret somethings, i regret what i haven't done. I regret pictures not taken because i was not comfortable or too shy to take them. I regret to having the camera with me or not having the guts to go and tell someone that i wanted their picture. Time never comes back and one should seize the day. Carpe diem. As a person told me today, we only live once and that time is now.

I regret not finding a way to go to Romenia when i was 19, to help in the orphanages. I am still hunted by those children. At the time i told everybody i wanted to do that, no one wanted to go with me, no one helped, but i could have tried harder, i could not listen to them and gone, just gone. I didn't and now regret not having done all and gone.

When i went to Poland in the day of my return, i had a couple of hours to kill, so i decided to take a walk in Warsaw and lunch something. Warsaw, at least the places i knew, is just ugly. It was sunny day, the trees where showing off the new green, it was spring rising. I was wondering what to do when i notice a girl coming in my direction. She had been crying. She made me stop and asked for my help. She told me that her father was hill and she didn't knew what to do. I told i couldn't help her the best i managed and went my way. But i could, at least i could have stopped, sited on a bench with her and talked. I can't forget her face and i can't forgive me for not talking to her and having lunch.

I regret what i haven't done ...